Come One, Come All!
Meet the Fabulous, Fickle, Free-Loading, Fallacious, Fanatical, Farcical, Felonious, Floundering FLIP FLOP MAN!
The Astounding, Truth-Defying Contortions of G.W Bush!
By Cheryl Seal
The Rove-ling Brothers Circus has come to town with its amazing Center Ring attraction: FLIP FLOP MAN! He whines (when the press doesn't cooperate)! He dines (with corporate execs and their checkbooks)! He car-awlllllllls on his belly like a reptile! You've never seen anything like him under the Big Top (of the White House) ever before! He's played to a crowned head of Europe (Tony Blair's sidekick Queen Elizabeth). He's stunned audiences from Kalamazoo to Kuwait with his sleight of hand! It's the one, the only (thank God!), the OUTGOING (in January 2005), George W. Bush, the World's Foremost FLIP FLOP MAN!!!!!!!!!
Here's a just a sampling of his confounding and truth-defying stunts!
FLIP: 2001: Bush Opposed the McCain-Feingold campaign finance reform,
especially the ban on soft money.
FLOP: 2002: Seeing the popularity of the reform, Bush says he supported
campaign finance reform all along.
FLIP: 2002: Bush vehemently opposes the creation of an independent 9/11
FLOP: 2003: After the commission is formed over Bush's objections and it
is apparent it is being closely attended to by the public, Bush claims
spokesfolk claim he supported the creation of the commission all along.
FLIP: Campaign 2000: Bush says he will support a patient's bill of rights.
FLOP: 2001-2003: Bush administration fights move to push through a patient's bill
FLIP: 2001: Bush pledges not to touch Social Security.
FLOP: 2002: Bush's latest budget calls for Social Security funds to be used to
fund a smorgasbord of other programs, through 2013.
FLIP: 2001: Bush pledges to open talks with North Korea
FLOP 2002: Bush suspends diplomacy, says No. Korea is 'evil" and pledges to
have a zero tolerance policy.
FLIP: 2003-2004: Bush refuses to confront North Korea's nuke program and instead
offers almost pleading incentives to disarm.
FLIP: 2002: Bush pledges to maintain a continuous strong military presence in
South Korea, says it is critical to peace.
FLOP: 2004: Just as tensions with North Korea escalate, Bush announces the
pullout of thousands of troops from South Korea.
FLIP: Spring 2001: Bush says that the Taliban are good for Afghanistan because
they offer stability. Through early August, 2001, Bush reps are in peaceful
negotiations with Taliban reps, who offer to hand Osama Bin Laden over.
FLOP: October 2002: Bush proclaims the Taliban an evil regime that must be
removed and declares war on Afghanistan for "harboring" Osama Bin
FLIP: 2000 campaign: Bush pledges to use "sound science" in his policies.
FLOP: 2001-2004: Bush administration systemmatically fires, ignores, or overrides
top scientific experts, including Nobelists who fail to support the Bush
FLIP: Fall 2001: Bush vows to capture Osama Bin Laden and names the pursuit a
number one priority.
FLOP: March, 2002 (as he begins gearing up for his trumped war against Irag),
Bush tells press he no longer cares where Bin Laden is - that he isn't that
FLIP: 2000: Bush assures voters in 2000 that he would not to use US troops in
FLOP: 2002-2004: Bush commits over 135,000 US troops to Iraq to secure a
regime change and maintain an occupation with enforced democracy - ie, the
very definition of nation building.
FLIP: In his 2000 campaign, Bush supported the ban on assault weapons, agreeing that
the ban saves lives
FLOP: As the assault weapon ban bill runs out, Bush refuses to support the
FLIP: Sept. 3, 2004: Bush pledges to reduce the costs of health care for Medicare
FLOP: Sept. 4, 2004: Bush administration announces the biggest Medicare
premium hike in the program's history.
FLIP: During campaign 2000, Bush pledged to support mandatory regulation of
carbon dioxide (CO2), the most critical greenhouse gas.
FLOP: April 2001: Bush's energy plan not only FAILS to call for regulations on
CO2, it calls for hundreds of new coal-fired, CO2-belching power plants
poweplants, and eases regulations on the oldest, dirtiest plants
belching the MOST CO2.
FLIP: 2002: Bush calls for the expansion of the Americorps from 50,000 to 75,000
FLOP: Budget 2003: Bush blocks any increase of Americorps volunteers above
50,000 by limiting the Americorps budget to barely enough for 50,000 volunteers.