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The Ashcroft Nomination: What Would Jesus Say?
Corinne Sinclair

What Would Jesus Say (WWJS): John, I'm not happy with you, you have repeatedly violated the 3rd Commandment "you shall not make wrong use of the name of the Lord your God".

ASHCROFT: When, Jesus?

WWJS: Every time you are not talking directly to God or to myself, and every time you are not talking to someone about US, you are using OUR names in vain. Count how many times you used the names God, Lord or Jesus Christ in your speeches. Were you praying to US or talking about US? No, you most often used our names in vain.

ASHCROFT: But, Jesus, at Bob Jones University, I said that I have no king but Jesus.

WWJS: John, you said "we have no king but Jesus", not "I have no king but Jesus". And even if you had, you would have violated the 1st commandment, "you shall have no other God to set against me".

ASHCROFT: How can that be, Jesus?

WWJS: John, when comes the end, I will deliver up the kingdom to God, my Father, after abolishing every kind of domination, authority, and power, and I will be made subordinate to God who made all things subject to him, and that includes America. God is the King of kings, so you can only be my Father's royal subject, not mine. And please stop calling me Jesus, I'm not a carpenter anymore, I am Christ, who was nailed on the cross for you, so at the very least, you should call me Jesus-Christ.

ASHCROFT: But, Jesus, you must admit I have observed the other commandments.

WWJS: John, John….. You violated the 4th commandment "you shall not steal".

ASHCROFT: I'm not a thief!

WWJS: John, if something is not yours to begin with, you have no right in taking it. Even what you think is no big deal, like paying your deputy campaign manager Tom Deuschle with the taxpayers' money when you were Missouri's Attorney General, is stealing.

ASHCROFT: But, Jesus, it was an "isolated occurrence".

WWJS: John, a one-time killer can also say that. You are no better than them and you're certainly not above God's law. Especially since you did violate the 9th commandment, which says you shall not give false evidence against your neighbor and will not lie or spread rumors, at least once.

ASHCROFT: When, Jesus?

WWJS: When you claimed, on the Senate floor, that Judge White would "push law in a pro-criminal direction" if confirmed, and that he "had a tremendous bent toward criminal activity". You also used false evidence to derail the man's nomination. You didn't do the man Justice.

ASHCROFT: Jesus, the man's dissents did not meet standards under Missouri law. I had to enforce state law.

WWJS: John, the Bible says that the law is an excellent thing, provided we treat it as law, recognizing that it is not aimed at good citizens, but at the lawless and unruly, the impious and sinful, the irreligious and worldly; at parricides and matricides, murderers and fornicators, perverts, kidnappers, liars, perjurers - in fact all whose behavior flouts the wholesome teaching which conforms with the gospel entrusted to me, the gospel which tells of the glory of God in his eternal felicity" (Tim 1:8-11). The Ten Commandments were given by God Himself to save man from the evil and lawlessness, that's why they work, if man will just institute and enforce them, since they are the basic laws that govern society and since they are in written form.

ASHCROFT: Jesus, I consider obedience to biblical law a personal duty and a spiritual joy.

WWJS: Good, John. God demands one thing above all else: obedience.

ASHCROFT: Of course, Jesus.

WWJS: Well, John, as you obviously won't be able to enforce the laws created by man, because you must, as a christian, obey God's ten commandments, I'm sorry to say that you're not fit to be US Attorney General.