Spoof: "Sprinkled throughout the [GOP Convention] crowd, in full view of the world and the troops returning from Iraq - some with disfiguring and life-altering injuries - were Purple Heart bandages. When asked what the bandage was for, Cheryl Roberts, a delegate from South Carolina, said that "it was just a little scratch." Roberts joined the ranks of several hundred ignorant and truly despicable delegates who also had placed the Purple Heart bandages on their person. The move was meant to not only criticize Kerry, who some conservatives [falsely] claim falsely filed reports to obtain medals, but also to prove once and for all America was truly a land full of poorly educated, selfish and truly evil individuals. "It's a well-known fact that no one gets wounded in wars," Roberts said. "Just look at the news on the TV - they never show any pictures or video of wounded soldiers because they don't exist! It's just some innocent fun," she said."

Washington Post: "Young, tough and brazenly ambitious, Brett Buerck and Kyle Sisk made quite a name for themselves behind the scenes at the state capitol. They made money, lots of it, and then -- to their regret -- they became famous. So what do a couple of formerly fast-lane Republican operatives such as Buerck and Sisk have to do with this year's presidential election? President Bush can only hope the answer is not much. Some Ohio Republicans worry that Buerck's and Sisk's influence on the 2004 election may be more consequential. [C]ontroversies have scuffed the Republican brand name in Ohio. The most malodorous of these involves allegations of improper fundraising and self-dealing [which] erupted onto Ohio front pages in the spring, and federal and state criminal investigations are underway [which allege] that Buerck, 31, and Sisk, 34, had received kickbacks from contracts with political firms hired by the House Republican caucus."

"Deal W. Hudson, the publisher of the conservative Roman Catholic journal Crisis and the architect of a Republican effort to court Catholic voters, says he is resigning as an adviser to the Bush campaign because of a Catholic newspaper's investigation into accusations of sexual misconduct involving a female student at a college where he once taught. 'At the time, I dealt with this in an upright manner, and the matter was satisfactorily resolved long ago,' Hudson wrote." Gee, that tactic wouldn't have appeased the GOP morality police for Bill Clinton (Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, etc.). And Bill Clinton never set himself up to be a "spiritual leader" and model of "religious morality." As ever, when it comes to hypocrisy, the Repugs rule supreme!

"Virginia Democrats have pulled the state police and a federal prosecutor into their eavesdropping lawsuit against the Republican Party. Attorneys for a group of Democratic lawmakers have subpoenaed state police Superintendent Steven Flaherty and U.S. Attorney Paul McNulty to demand documents related to the eavesdropping investigation. They also subpoenaed records from Attorney General Jerry Kilgore's office in an effort to find out more about his top aide's involvement in the case. Kilgore and Flaherty have responded; McNulty's office has asked for more time to determine what documents it can provide, according to Ken Smurzynski, the Democrats' lead attorney... The controversy began in 2002 when the Republican Party of Virginia's top staffer secretly listened to and taped a pair of Democratic conference calls. McNulty and the state police led the criminal probe of the matter, securing guilty pleas from the chief eavesdropper and from three other players in the scandal."

AP: "M. Jodi Rell was sworn in Thursday as Connecticut's governor, promising to restore 'faith, integrity and honor' after taking over from John G. Rowland, who resigned amid a federal corruption investigation and a threatened impeachment. Rell, 58, a Republican who ran on Rowland's ticket three times, took the oath of office shortly after noon on the north steps of the state Capitol."

The AP reports, "The former head of a Republican consulting group has pleaded guilty to jamming Democratic telephone lines in several New Hampshire cities on Election Day two years ago. The jamming involved more than 800 computer-generated calls and lasted for about 1 1/2 hours on Nov. 5, 2002, the day voters decided several races, including a close Senate contest between outgoing Gov. Jeanne Shaheen and GOP Rep. John E. Sununu, who won by fewer than 20,000 votes. The lines that were jammed were set up so voters could call for rides to the polls. Democrats say the jamming was an organized, statewide effort that may have even affected the outcome of some local races. 'There is, short of murder, not much that is more horrific in America than purposely trying to stop people from voting,' said Raymond Buckley, vice chairman of the state Democratic Party." Republicans admit they can't win fairly when they resort to criminal cheating. Next up - W and Jeb Bush?

Boston.com: "Majority leader Bill Frist refused yesterday to criticize Dick Cheney for cursing on the floor of the Senate in a confrontation with a Democratic senator. {Frist] indicated that Cheney's outburst at Senator Patrick Leahy, of Vermont, can be attributed to political passions aroused by the election year. [ya know what they say about bad excuses - they're like armpits in a locker room on a hot day: everybody has at least one and they all stink!] Cheney later confirmed to Fox News his use of the obscenity, and said he felt better after saying it." Spoken like a true brownshirt thug!

"Anticipating a quick end to Jack Ryan's candidacy for the US Senate, state Republican leaders on Thursday began looking ahead to replace him on the November ballot, with former State Board of Education Chairman Ron Gidwitz emerging as the leading contender... 'It's repulsive and alien for people in southern Illinois,' Richard Stubblefield, Jefferson County GOP chairman, said of the sex club allegations. 'It's time to move on. It's time to have another candidate.' Even more outspoken was state Sen. Kirk Dillard (R-Hinsdale), who also is GOP chairman in DuPage County. 'Only in the Land of Oz would people think that Jack Ryan can beat Barack Obama after this week's activity,' Dillard said, referring to the Democratic contender for the Senate post. 'Mr. Ryan needs to understand this is more than just about the United States Senate. His debacle hurts our chances of picking up Downstate seats in the General Assembly, and he may cost us a Supreme Court race.'" Poor Jack quit the race.

"Sen. George Allen (R-Va.), chairman of the National Republican Senatorial Committee, gave Ryan his support. 'Sen. Allen talked to Jack this morning,' said Dan Allen, NRSC communications director. 'We're fully behind and fully supportive of Jack.'... Ryan's campaign spokesman said that, with the allegations public after months of rumors about what the documents contained, the candidate could begin to refocus his campaign on other issues and move forward. [LOL!] 'He's got the monkey off his back,' Bill Pascoe said. 'For months, there's been a whispering campaign about what's in the documents from political opponents. Now that the documents have been released, everybody can see: a) those rumors weren't true, and b) there's not an allegation that there was any marital infidelity, there's not even an allegation that he broke one of the Ten Commandments [what about THOU SHALT NOT LIE!], there's not even an allegation that he broke the law.'" LoL! No, but who wants a pervert in the Senate?

It's only Day 2 of Kinky Jack Ryan's Sex Scandal, yet he's already breaking the Guiness record for lies per day. Ryan lied to IL GOP Chair Judy Baar Topinka earlier this year when he told her there was nothing embarrassing in his divorce papers, and he lied Tuesday when he told the media she didn't ask that specific question. He lied Tuesday when he told the media he had warned GOP leaders last weekend of the kinky details; former Gov. Jim Edgar says Ryan omitted the kinkiest parts. Finally, he lied about Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Robert A. Schnider, who ordered the opening of the files, when he said he was appointed by "Jerry Brown, the most liberal governor of California in history." As the Chicago Tribune points out, "Schnider, who in 2000 received the LA County Bar Association's Outstanding Jurist Award, was first appointed to the bench in 1981 by superior court judges in Los Angeles. He was named a full judge only two years ago by Gov. Gray Davis, a moderate Democrat."

"Actress Jeri Ryan accused ex-husband Jack Ryan of insisting she go to 'explicit sex clubs' in New York, New Orleans and Paris during their marriage -- including 'a bizarre club with cages, whips and other apparatus hanging from the ceiling.' Jack Ryan wanted her to have sex with him while others watched, the star of 'Boston Public' alleged... Three GOP leaders are fuming over the disclosures, saying they do not square with what Ryan told them to expect. State Republican chairman Judy Baar Topinka believes Ryan lied to her by suggesting the papers contained nothing embarrassing, a source close to Topinka said. Former Gov. Jim Edgar was stunned to hear about Jeri Ryan's allegations after Jack Ryan called Edgar over the weekend to describe the files, but made no mention of the sex clubs... And Downstate U.S. Rep. Ray LaHood (R-Ill.) called on Ryan to step down. 'I think there's no way the people in Illinois will countenance the type of information and activity he was involved with.' "

Boy, you just can't beat the quality of the GOP & their backers these days, can ya? Let's see...just as a sampling: we have pathological liars in the nation's top positions, a boiler room scam artist ripping off children's charities (Tom Delay), a veritable racketeer as Gov. of CT (Rowland), the Republican mayor of Waterbury, CT, who recently was convicted of child molestation (Giordano), Rush Limbaugh, top GOP spokesman, a junkie who laundered drug money... and now Illinois GOP senate hopeful Jack Ryan whose wife, the lovely Jeri Lynn Ryan, says he asked her to perform sex acts in clubs while others watched, including a club in NYC equipped with "cages, whips and other apparatus hanging from the ceiling." And these sleazoids are STILL whining about CLINTON?

Al Kamen writes, "One of the odder tales floating around these days comes from the press in India, which reports that the RNC has outsourced its fundraising and voter canvassing call centers to Noida and Gurgaon, that is, India... The RNC flatly, totally, completely denied the allegations, which had been heavily peddled by the Democrats, saying it was an 'untrue urban legend.'... But the Hindustan Times, a rather conservative, 1 million circulation English daily, is standing by its story, an account reporter K.A. Badarinath told us he spent weeks working on. The oddest thing is that Capital Communications, a key player in this strange yarn, which received nearly $500,000 from the Republicans last year and nearly $3.5 million in the 2002 election cycle, appears to have gone out of business. Its phone number is 'no longer in service.' Efforts to locate its president, Bill Tierney, so far have been fruitless. The RNC says it doesn't know where he is." Hmm - is he with Osama - or Hoffa?

AFP: "Jessica Cutler, 24 - who has become better known in Washington circles by her nom de plume, "Washingtonienne" - was dismissed last week from her job as an entry-level aide to Republican Senator Mike DeWine. Her jauntily written internet diary includes lurid descriptions of sexual encounters on Capitol Hill and other venues in official Washington -- some allegedly involving prominent, but unnamed, paramours. The tawdry accounts, which have become "must-reads" in Washington, include descriptions of sexual favours for money, which she says she grants to supplement her paltry paycheck. "Most of my living expenses are thankfully subsidised by a few generous older gentlemen," she writes in one entry on her "blog," "I just took a long lunch with F [hmm.....Frist?], and made a quick 400 dollars," she reveals in another entry. "When I returned to the office, I heard that the boss was asking about my whereabouts. Loser."

If this had been the Democratic Party, this story would be blasted across headlines all over the nation. Calls for an independent counsel would be ringing throughout Capitol Hill! Instead, a quarter-million-dollar case of GOP fraud is being tucked into the news background with euphemistic titles like 'RNC Pays FEC Fine' instead of 'RNC Siphons $250,000 in Illegal Funds from Federal Loan Company.' Last week, Alan Greenspan announced his fears that Fannie Mae was carrying so much mortgage debt that it was jeopardizing national economic security! (see http://www.contracostatimes.com/mld/cctimes/business/8037582.htm) Guess now we know how Fannie got away with it - they paid for the privilege in advance! Now while the RNC gets a slap on the wrist, the taxpayer may in the end, pay the real price.