The List of Ist

By Suzanne Levisay

What am I? Well, I wonder
My point of view for what it is
Is that my friends not suffer.
But who is it, on my list?

A homeless man, in the street,
Not my friend; that's the gist.
You see, if I should indeed
Help him out--that's socialist!

An injured child whose parents lack
Insurance to get her fixed
Can't help there, I'd look back
And have to say, socialist!

The sick, the lame, frail old timers.
To them, no obligation.
But clean, well-groomed corporate climbers
Must feel no deprivation.

Therefore, I say I'll adhere
To those not dirty, not unclean.
To those who have the lion's share.
Owners of American dream.

I want to give them more and more,
To see no chance as missed
In shifting revenue, to its core,
To my pals, the capitalists!

I'm so creative, finding ways
To grab the money from the fists
Of those whose labor paves the way
To help us out. How corporatist!

Yes, that's me, the corporatist!
Not the conservative some would think.
Because I am the specialist
In spending funds. I spew red ink.

Too bad that some will try to say
My policies sound so fascist.
But without my kindly aid,
As a clever propagandist,

The rich would just be naked.
Grist for the mill of class warfare.
So first I'll try to waken
Sympathy for universal care:

The good of all without delay--
I'll act the part of populist!
But I'm tricky. My words betray
The truth: that I'm elitist!

I've caused a war tailor-made
To bring wealth to Halliburton,
Bechtel, Worldcom, others laid
In place to make it certain

That I've done my part in the shift
Of taxes paid by those who work.
From them to those who need the gift
Of subsidy through legal perk.

Medicare--prescription drug plan.
I found a way to spend more dough,
To help the ones who surely can
Use it to make their interests grow:

Dealers in pharmaceuticals,
Insurers who want to sell,
Healthcare for dollars, dimes, nickels.
From my plan, they'll all get help.

And then the finale--my coup!
Exploration of Mars, the moon!
What benefits I then can do
For private interests. What a boon!

It's really such an act of pretense,
The notion of the public good.
For me there's really no intent
Of gain for any but those who would

Benefit me, the corporatist!
But wait--I redistribute wealth.
Could I also be a socialist,
The kind who gives the rich their health

But taking from the poor and middle
To care for fellow capitalists?
Oh, this is such a tiring riddle
I may just need a psychiatrist!